further, deeper, greater

When I consider the depths of who I am, I realize I cannot even fathom what is there. I am a mystery even to myself when I strive to understand the depths of the soul, spirit, and body. I read Psalm 139 about a God of light and dark. A God of mountains and ocean! Even those things I can at least see and take in, but Psalm 139 reminds us that we are further, deeper, and greater than even the mountains, light, dark, and ocean.

Psalm 139 reveals to us the depths of our spirit, but it also praises a God who knows and controls all these very depths that we cannot even reach with any entirety. Ozzie Chambers says, "The work of the Holy Spirit is in the dim regions of our personality which we cannot get at."

We are reminded by the Psalmist that God is deeper, further, greater than we can grasp, but that His Spirit truly does change and restore that core place of who we are; that place we struggle to get at. That ongoing restoration is entire and complete (1 Thess. 5:23)

The greatest disappointment is for us to assume these depths of ourselves and the work of the Holy Spirit with these depths are myth because we have no conscious experience of them. There are depths to our spirit we cannot consciously experience, but we need God to be our God, who can search and restore the depths we cannot get at.

We need the cleansing of sin at the very depths we cannot get at. We are terribly mislead when we say we are not conscious of our sin. Sure! There are depths to our darkness we are not conscious of, and God does regenerate and restore those things if would but ask.

There are depths to our light that we are not aware of either, and God will reveal the brighter parts of who we are when we would but ask.

There is depth to our greatness as men and women created in the image of God, and He will reveal and unleash those things if we would but ask.

When we think on these things of soul and spirit, we realize God truly knows us better than we know ourselves.

Why we let go

We do not give things up for the sake of giving things up. We give things up for the sake of being closer to God and obeying Him more fully. The things we give up are of no value to God. What is of value to God is my very life.

We do not give things up because doing so brings us closer to God. We give things up because we finally recognize nothing else is more important than being closer to God. We give them up "for the sake of the only thing worth having". Getting rid of things does not, themselves, bring us closer to God. Getting rid of things loosens our grip on the things which keep us from grasping a stronger relationship with God.

Note to self: for fathers of daughters

Every dream, pretend, and imaginative story! Every time she calls you her best friend and her prince. When she wants to 'help' you work in the garage or cry over nothing. These are invitations for which your actions cannot help but RSVP

If you continue declining the invitations they will grow less frequent and I fear you may not be invited to the real moments of her teenage years

2013 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2013 annual report for this blog.

Here's an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 11,000 times in 2013. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 4 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

You're Welcome: Beautiful Eulogy

Every once in a while, I come upon an obsession. More often than not, that obsession is a music artist or spoken word artist. For years, my favorite band has been the Counting Crows. While they may remain my all-time favorite, it is possible they are being replaced as my favorite artists. They are being replaced by Beautiful Eulogy. Listen, I realize hip-hop as a genre is not for everyone. There is one radio station here in Sacramento whose entire tagline is "All of todays hits without the rap". (There IS a difference between "rap" and "hip-hop" but that is for another post). Even if you do not especially enjoy hip-hop, you still ought to give Beautiful Eulogy a shot for a few diffferent reasons.

1. Theologically Rich (not watered down truth) 

"The beautiful lyrical theology is the driving force of the group's music. They have taken the approach of presenting 'meaty' theological truths and addressing biblical concepts, imploring listeners to join them on the journey of growing in understanding and in love with the one true God." - Christianity Today

2. Talent Rich (not "crappy Christian" art)

An enormous pet peeve is watching Christians create art that is only a crappy carbon copy of the art being produced in the culture outside the faith. As those created in the image of the ultimate creator, those with a relationship with Him ought to be creating great art. Beautiful Eulogy would kill it in the market if they were not speaking such solid theological truth. They are that great at what they do.

3. You don't have to be rich (its free)

All the artists on the Humble Beast label give their albums for free on their website. You can get both of Beautiful Eulogy's albums for free at the website, and while you're there, check into all the other artists. I could affix these same praises to every other artist at Humble Beast.

Below are two great Beautiful Eulogy videos for you to check out:

Release Me From This Snare (most recently released video) [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YggGjJfUONA&w=640&h=360]

Beautiful Eulogy [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gz09EF4obYQ&w=640&h=360]

A lot of...

From time to time, I want to share the things I have been getting a lot of lately. You may read them as recommendations. You may read them as random bullet points. Lately I have been... Listening to a lot of... Beautiful Eulogy (great hip hop + theology), old dirty blues music (always a special part of my heartbeat), DL Rossi (decent music + raw reflections on faith and church), United Pursuit Band (favorite worship right now)

Reading a lot of... textbooks (always always always), Untitled by Blaine Hogan (creativity and its process), Platform by Michael Hyatt (slowing building one), How to Develop a Powerful Prayer Life by Gregory Frizzell (easy read but hard to read)

Watching a lot of... SNL (because I'm the biggest fan), New Girl (the ONLY show that never piles up in our DVR), Modern Family (see New Girl's description)

Spending a lot of time... drinking coffee at Chocolate Fish, taking my girls on adventures, reading books and writing papers

When Bryleigh and I went to not the best part of town

Bryleigh and I ran to the store for a few things we were missing for dinner. As of late, two small children always at the heels means if Tonya or I are heading out for something, you are taking one child with you.

I love this.

While we do much of our grocery shopping at Trader Joes where we can make healthier choices, our closer and cheaper grocery store is 'not in the best part of town'. There is a part of me that prefers these parts of town.

On our way out of the store to the car, we were approached by a not uncommon beggar. Having worked several years with the homeless, addicted, and transient culture, I could recognize this man was not intoxicated in any fashion. He already had a box of food in a cart. He approached me wanting to get his story out as fast as he can (a story I don't need to hear, but I'm listening). He mentions he had just met a pastor at Walgreens who helped him out by getting him this food for his family, but he still really needs milk. Could we get him some milk?

"Yeah! I can get you some milk. Bryleigh, let's go back in and get some milk for our friend here."

Bryleigh says, "Why are we going back inside to get milk?" The man answers, "Because your dad is a good man!"

We go in to get the milk, and on our way in I ask Bryleigh, "Why do you think we are getting milk for that man?" "I don't know." "We want to be nice to everyone we meet, but we also do this because Jesus asked that we do nice things for people."

When we come back out to give the man the milk, I tell him, "I guess you hit the pastor jackpot tonight." "You're a pastor?" "I am." "Well I'm gonna go home tonight and thank my heavenly Father."

Now a few days later a few things stick out from that experience: - A man in need spoke to my daughter that her dad is a good man. - An opportunity to teach by example the care for others and the reason we do so - A missed opportunity to tell that man, "Thank you." - A missed opportunity to tell that man, "Lets pray and thank our heavenly Father right now."

Why we work hard

"but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands what is good, SO THAT he will have something to share with one who has need." -Ephesians 4:28

Why do we work hard? Why should we work hard and save our money?

We work hard and we are not lazy or stealing SO THAT we have money and resources to help those in need. We also work hard to steward and save our money for these same purposes. It is very oppositional to our American Dream and normal American perspective of money and gain.

Here in scripture we are told that we work hard FOR the opportunity to share what we get. This, for me, requires a check to my motivation and my worry.

Am I motivated to work hard that I may earn enough to be able to share and serve others OR do I work hard that I may earn enough to be able to say I've earned enough?

What worries me most when it comes to my work and my gain? Why am I worried in the times when funds are low? Am I worried because it means I will be unable to then give to those in need and share what I have. OR  Am I really worried because once more it is going to mean I cannot financially sustain the lifestyle and pleasures I have built for myself?

If I worried more about the former than the latter, somehow I think funds would be low on a much rarer occasion.

Grace of Preaching

The story goes, a small church somewhere had transitioned pastors and began to see outrageous growth. There were not only people coming to church, but there were many who came to Christ.

An interested person visited to see what was happening there, and was able to speak with an elder.

"So what was it your old pastor preached." "He preached that we were all sinners in need of grace that can only be found in Christ." "What is it this new pastor is preaching?" "He preaches that we are all sinners in need of grace that can only be found in Christ." "I fail to see a difference." "Well, this new pastor preaches it with tears in his eyes."

I must say the fact that God continues to give me opportunities to speak and preach is all grace. That he continues to give me opportunities to speak about the gospel of his ridiculous love is Amazing Grace.

I have been made a minister, according to the gift of God's grace...to me the very least of all saints, this grace was given, to preach the unfathomable riches of Christ.

Every opportunity to preach the gospel is a reminder of how very little merit I have to deserve this honor and responsibility. I never take it so lightly as to miss how desperately undeserving I actually am. I am "less than the least of all God's people" who is continually given ludicrous grace to preach the outrageous, reckless, raging fury that is the love of God.

Ends and Means

Matthew Henry writes, "All who are chosen to happiness in the end, are chosen to holiness as the means." 

I have had this quote in my head for a couple weeks now. There is a great reminder to us in a culture obsessed with happiness. Over and over again we see people come through our doors prepared to end commitments and covenants because someone has told them, "Don't you deserve to be happy?" This very thing has lead to the breakdown of our lives, and it has lead us also to our addictiveness. 

This is the very nature of addiction. Things are addicting because they always leave you wanting more, and they destroy you all along the way. They cannot fulfill you. Whether it is sex or substances. Whether it is more stuff in our closets, driveways, or pockets. We are addicted to these things when we think the only important thing is our happiness, and we start to believe these things will make us happy. And they do…for only a moment. That is the very point of these things; to only make you feel good and happy for a short time so that you want it again. Do you have something you desire and crave more than Jesus and a connection with Jesus? Do you see how CRAZY and absolutely LUDICROUS it is for me to desire and crave anything more than I crave a loving real connection with Jesus Christ?

God's Absence

On your darkest nights of pruningDo not expect to bear fruit

no one bears fruit in pruning

The experience of absence Is not the absence of experience buds will develop in time

and it will be beautiful