The hope of communion

The experience of absence is not the absence of experience. I have heard this many times.

"If you asked a man who is poor in spirit to describe his prayer life, he might well answer, 'Most of the time my prayer consists in experiencing the absence of God in the hope of communion.'" - Brennan Manning

Brennan adds another dimension to our desired connection with God through successful prayer: the hope of communion.  The man who is truly poor in spirit is there because he continues searching after and coming before God regardless of whether he experiences or FEELS connection with God each time.  He keeps coming back because he has HOPE.  He has a hope for communion.  We cannot allow ourselves to be thwarted by the experience of absence when we approach God.  I believe it will happen more often than not.  On the other hand, as one who truly longs for God through it all, I have to continually go back to God with the HOPE of communion, and I must maintain that hope every time I approach the throne and lap of God the Abba.

Psalm 27:4 says,

"One thing I ask of the Lord this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple."

Matthew 5:3 says,

"Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."

I am screwed....UNLESS

I cannot get enough of the song "Always" by Kristian Stanfill. (go here for the lyrics). Today the song played so well with my entanglement time.

Psalm 27 says, "I would have despaired UNLESS I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD. In the land of the living. Wait for the LORD. Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the LORD."

I wrote to Bryleigh (and in my journal to myself):

Always believe and trust God's goodness...no matter what happens. If you can stubbornly trust His goodness, nothing can bring you so far down.

That unwavering trust and belief will help your heart be strong and courageous. Because in everything you face you will be able to say, "It is going to be okay. I do not know when but my God WILL come through; he always does. I will just wait for Him to come through; He always does."

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yb4VvNq8WEM&w=560&h=315]

one thing I ask

I am not one to ask many things of God. I fear making him into some sort of cosmic santa claus at my beckon call.  My heart resonates more with David in Psalm 27. "ONE THING I ASK of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life; to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord."  Of all the things I could ask God for, my heart constantly only desires one thing.  I only ask that I may be with God and know Him more and seek Him.  I do not ask many things of God, but I certainly ask this one thing.  My heart leaps within myself and it seems to always scream, "Seek his Face!  Seek God still!  Be with God again!" (27:8)  It is interesting that David is in the midst of great turmoil when he wrote this Psalm.  He was being attacked by several armies; he was in a great struggle, and he had needs.  There were, in these circumstances, all sorts of things he could have rightfully asked God for.  But he still came to God and said, "ONE THING I ASK of the Lord..."  Of all the things he could have asked God for, he was only concerned with one.  "My heart says of you, 'Seek His face!' Your face, Lord, I will seek." My life is chaotic to say the least right now. Life gets more and more crazy, and I cannot keep up with it. There are so many things I could ask of God right now, but my heart truly desires only ONE THING.  I only ask one thing; that I may be connected to the heart of God for the rest of my life, to see and notice God's phenomenal love for me each day. To "gaze at the beauty of the Lord", to simply rest.