When God wrote my aching heart a letter

You are successful, PC. No matter what anyone else says or expects of you, if you will remain obedient, faithful, and passionate, you are and will be successful.

Trust this, PC. Trust it and allow your aching heart to be affected by what I am saying to you.

I have given you this word:

SUCCESSFUL

You are my son. I am very pleased with you. You have been obedient and faithful through your ache and dryness. PC, you are successful and I have wired you for this success.

I DEFINE YOUR SUCCESS, PC. No one and nothing else defines your success. If you remain obedient to the things I have wired you for!

I love you, PC. I have never left you. I have never been far off from you. In fact, your aching heart has been so much closer to me than you even realized.

We will be lovers once more. I have your heart. I always have. Even when it aches, it has always been mine. I am proud of you, and you are successful, son.

Prayer is the Relationship

It seems I do everything else more than I pray when I should be praying more than anything else. And being a pastor just means I have gone pro at this misdirection. Many of us are excellent organizers, promoters, strategists, leaders, but we are poor pray-ers. Many of us rely on our gifts and talents instead of God who gave those gifts and talents, and that reliance and power is in prayer. Where there is little prayer there is little power.

Prayer is not an element of our relationship with God. Prayer IS your relationship with God. [Tweet That]

Do I want a powerful new relationship with God? Do I hunger and thirst for deeper spiritual filling and vibrant ministry. I can go nowhere God is not already (Ps. 139:7-12). I cannot escape his presence, but I can entirely miss him.

God, allow my heart to be affected by this word.

My Inept Ministry Degree

Undergrad Graduation Day
Many pastors and ministers to be are thrilled to "go unto the world and preach the gospel". Chalk full of theology, exegesis, and confidence, and we are ready to reach the world for Jesus Christ.

Year Following Graduation
Work the backroom at American Eagle or make lattes for Starbucks while you apply for grad school or seminary.

Graduate School/Seminary Graduation
The joke that theologians are just people answering questions nobody is asking is not funny. More and more confidence abounds to will-be-pastors and ministers.

I was ready and prepared to do ministry now. I am pretty solid on where I stand doctrinally, theologically, and most importantly, I know where I fall on the T.U.L.I.P. scale.

First Month of Pastoral Ministry
I have no idea what to tell a student who comes to me fearing she may have contracted AIDS while doing missions work in Africa.

Where was THAT class?

Second Month of Pastoral Ministry
Random jibberish terms like: ministry budget, proposed budget, faith budget, overdrawn, fleeting resources, income not meeting spending, church mortgage, pay roll, etc.

"It was my understanding there would be no math."

Third Month of Pastoral Ministry
A call is made of an elderly man in the ICU who is not expected to live through the weekend. All he wants is to speak to a pastor.

You're a pastor! Your nicely framed diploma says so.

It turns out a man who has owned more cars than years you've been alive does not want to hear much from a young ministry graduate as he's preparing to meet Jesus face to face.

He asks nothing about total depravity. Too bad, I was prepared for that question.

Fourth Month of Pastoral Ministry
Another homeless addict has made his way through the doors wanting to speak to a pastor. Maybe he's in dire need! Maybe he's manipulating you for things he does not need that you do not have.

I don't remember learning about this anywhere.

Fifth Month of Pastoral Ministry
The congregation is already a bit upset with changes you have made when God continues to inspire you to new things. One person wants to talk about it WITH YOU (if you're lucky).

Conflict!

And it is not conflict about whether baptism should be sprinkle or immersion.

Conflict = YOU! You are the problem...always!

Where was my class about that?

Sixth Month of Pastoral Ministry
Start to wonder if your pastoral ministry degree and classes really gave you everything needed to be a pastor.