lost and found

Not like Jesus

The best part about artists and non-believers in general is their honesty.  Artists are specifically honest as you listen to their music...at least most of them are.  You listen and hear the honest struggle within each artist.  Those are the sorts of artists I love to listen to; the raw and exposed lyrics of honest writers.  This is a quality lost in most Christian music, which is a main reason I don't like it or listen to much of it.  These secular artists leave their reputations to the wind and write with ceaseless honesty about what goes on inside themselves.

Christians often lack this kind of honesty.  In most cases, our reputation is king.  So because of this, every piece of humanity or struggle that leaks out the holes in the mask are shocking and scandalous mostly because we never saw it coming.

As Derek Webb said in an interview, "We are all wrapped up in trying to look like Jesus instead of people who need Jesus."

We are so fearful that people will see us as we really are.  I want to live a life where I am not afraid of letting people see me as I really am.  Because truth of the matter is I'm NOT like Jesus...I don't look like Jesus...but I DO need him.

Without Jesus, I am absolutely lost and in the dark.  Alone, I am a man prone to being lost.  I have huge potential for being lost, but honestly I would rather people consistently see my potential lostness...my potential for being alone and broken...I would rather people see all of this instead of a pretty and shiny self-righteousness which I have a whole wardrobe full of to draw upon.  I would rather people see my brokenness and potential for straying because if all I ever show them is my righteous and confident garb they're going to be shocked when they find out I really am a ragamuffin, beat up, broken and bedraggled.

That's who I really am, Daddy's little boy who likes to get into everything (especially dirt), who is a little ragged but still looks to his Daddy with phenomenal awe.  That's who I really am, and I'd rather people just know that.