It makes me feel so good
To always tell you when you’re wrong
The big man that I am
To always have to put you down
Put you down
- Pedro the Lion, Criticism as Inspiration
In 10 years of ministry with students, I have seen many of them leave frustrated after having been challenged, reproved, or held accountable. Leaders like to think its the student’s “resistance to accountability” that made them leave. The students like to think the leader was too overbearing.
You will not like this post for one of two reasons.
1. You feel good holding people accountable and don’t like the feeling of being given a reason not to ALWAYS do so.
2. You are the one who has turned away from someone or a group because you have been held accountable too many times.
What is it about power outlets that attracts kids so greatly? There seems to be a sort of magic that flows from its holes which says to the childish heart, “Your finger goes here.”
One Super Bowl party stands out in my mind when a friend’s kid wanted candy and junk food so badly. The party was large enough that the kid was able to sneak away large amounts of what he craved and wanted against the warnings of his parents.
Stomach full of junk + lots of running around = vomiting in front of everyone
What he thought was his parents neglect for his happiness all the sudden seems like good advice.
Proverbs 9:8,9,12 says “Do not reprove the scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove the wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning. If you are wise, you are wise for yourself; if you scoff, you alone will bear it.”
Leaders need to learn to recognize the difference between those who have grown enough to recognize and receive accountability for growth and those who are not wise enough yet and will only turn away hating you at this point.
There are times when leaders need to let the unwise stick their finger in the socket and feel the shock.
If they do not receive your reproof after you have tried enough times, allow them to feel the shock. Perhaps you will save them from hating you and be there to pick them up when they fall.